Just (Un)Do It!!!

Nike has piled on the "now leaving Lance Armstrong" train, announcing late last week that it has ended its contract with the cycling phenom. Calling the evidence of Armstrong's doping "insurmountable" and suggesting that he "misled [us] for over a decade", the clothing and footwear manufacturer has severed its ties with him.  

"Nike does not condone the use of illegal performance enhancing drugs in any manner", it said in a statement. When the multinational corporation became so sanctimonious, however, was not revealed in their statement. It would appear that the philandering of Tiger Woods, the sexual assaults committed by Kobe Bryant, and the interstate dog-fighting ring financed by Michael Vick are all things that Nike can condone, as it has stood by those athletes amidst insurmountable evidence and even incarcerations.

...while you still can

Of course, Woods, Bryant, and Vick are all still actively involved in their sports (Vick returning after spending 21 months in prison), whereas Armstrong is not, which is the real reason Nike took this as an opportunity to dump him. The others could continue to pump out sales for Nike and pump up its bottom line. 

If Nike was genuinely concerned about its image, it would sever ties with all drug cheats, felons, sexists, racists, and criminals in its midst, but that clearly hasn't happened.

Sorry Nike, but taking the moral high road on this one hasn't fooled anyone.

Swoosh!!!

Science Always Catches Up

They saved Walt Disney’s brain. Or so we’ve been told, so that one day when science has cured all ills, Uncle Walt can be re-animated (excuse the pun) and carry on as a cartoon genius.

While this particular claim is long on rumor but short on facts, the process of freezing the dead, known as cryonics, does exist and many eccentric personalities, perhaps the most famous being baseball legend Ted Williams, are in a deep freeze somewhere awaiting that day when resuscitation of the dead becomes the latest medical marvel.

If this seems like too much sensational science fiction to you, a reminder of all the incurable diseases and unsolvable mysteries that have been put to rest by science is perhaps in order here. Scourges such as polio, tetanus, and typhoid fever are all manageable now and could be eradicated from the planet if vaccines were made available to all.  There was a time when volcanic eruptions were acts of God, hailstorms had religious interpretations, and no one could figure out how the bulky bumblebee was capable of flight. Science provided the answers.

So where am I going with this, you ask? Enter misfortuned Lance Armstrong. The seven-time Tour de France champion has long been suspected of doping in a sport where drugs seem to be the culture. The allegations have always been unequivocally denied by a smug Armstrong and his handlers with claims that all tests administered were passed at the time. End of story.

I’m not going to waste a syllable of this post railing on Mr. Armstrong; I think the good he’s allowed his celebrity to create greatly outweighs the bad, but I will suggest that science has caught up to Armstrong. Indeed, he did pass every test designed to catch cheaters while he was an active cyclist, but it would now appear that newer more innovative tests can now detect what was undetectable only a few short years ago. Ah, there’s the rub.

While Armstrong’s assertion that it’s “time to move forward” and that he will no longer defend the allegations is not an admission of guilt, it would certainly appear that he has read the writing on the wall and knows that the science won’t lie.

There are many lessons in the Lance Armstrong story, but maybe the least obvious is one that requires reefer mad, occasional pill-popping teenagers and other recreational drug users to take note.  Science always catches up.   Only a dope would think otherwise.